Thursday, September 22, 2011

I get it now

During the four years that my husband and I were desperately trying to get pregnant I would HATE it when someone would say to me, “You wouldn’t understand. You’re not a mom.” It would take every ounce of self control to not claw their eyes out. I thought I got it just fine.

I love kids. I’ve worked with kids as a preschool teacher (and now assistant director) since I was 17. There is a special place in my heart for children. Over the years I’ve had my favorites who I loved with all my heart. Or so I thought.

Now that I am a mother, I get it. I understand. I don’t know how to explain it but something just changes when you become a mother. Before I had Scarlett I would hear about a case of child abuse or those poor starving children in Africa and I would feel sad, but now it completely breaks my heart. All I can think about is, “What if that were my daughter?” Even hearing a child cry tears me up. I was with our 2 year old class at work the other day and a little girl fell and bumped her head and was crying. Before Scarlett I would have simply scooped her up and comforted her until she was done crying. Now? Now I picture Scarlett is the one who fell and bumped her head and is crying and it kills me. It absolutely kills me.

I knew that becoming a mother changes you but I had no idea. Until now.

I get it now.

305859_10150351877432268_836562267_7947261_328353978_nThis was her first time wearing jeans. It needed to be documented.

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